The words every prospective juror wants to hear, coming over my phone tonight, just after seven. My services are no longer required. Yippee.
In retrospect, it wasn't all that bad. One day of unrelenting boredom is not without its benefits. Under those circumstances, meditation becomes compulsory. While the statutory drama unfolds in the roundabout, you are left alone with your thoughts. When that fails, you become engrossed with the hair on the head, directly in front of you. Then you start counting the heads in the courtroom, including those of the judge, the lawyers and everybody else. Then you start thinking about all the things that you can do with the thirty dollars you're going to get. Then you get an uncontrollable urge to stand up, right then, and say, "Penguin dust!" to the prosecuting attorney. Then your thoughts become disordered and you become convinced that you have early onset Alzheimer's, except that you can't remember the name. Then you really get shook. Then, finally, you remember GOOG, and a feeling of joy and peace comes over you, in keeping with the season. Slowly, the profit motive returns, along with other vital signs, and you start thinking about how many jury days it would take to buy another 100 shares of GOOG....
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For enquiring minds, it would take 2384.2 days of jury duty, at the rate of $30 recompense per day, to purchase 100 shares of GOOG at 4:00 PM, yesterday.
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